motivation | Keeping up with the Walkers…

I did not have the best of week’s last week. Having received the news from my running coach that I had not followed my training schedule correctly and had therefore not improved as he would’ve liked sent me into a depressed spiral where I questioned my running and considered quitting.

I got blasted by my coach for even having thoughts of quitting. He said to me: Get your mind right!

Ironically, this is where I am lacking in “strength”. I am disciplined enough to train every day. I have even changed my diet, cutting out wheat and red meats. I drink enough water and have ensured I wear all the running gadgets one can buy. All the boxes are ticked. But getting up when I have fallen down is so difficult.

Previously, when it came to motivating myself and getting my head space right, I would sit quietly and repeat positive statements to myself. I would envisage myself running and completing races. I would fill my time with reading motivational running books. It would always be a very private and personal journey.

But there’s something I realised a few months ago when I started my blogging. When it comes to believing in my abilities, nothing helps me do that more than realising that others believe in me. In fact, spending time with people that build me up is exactly what I spent the week doing.

Dinner with a best friend (who meticulously read back to me every sentence from my coach’s email and analysed each comment with a fine tooth comb and turned each sentence into a positive statement – Marci, you mean the world to me), to the awesome run with an inspirational friend from Cape Town (Rogeema, you are too awesome for words) and an Iron Man (Morne) who surprised me with a visit, right down to the motivational tweets and caring comments on my blog telling me that quitting is not an option and that they believed in me.

There’s nothing that touched my heart more than realising that other people are so willing to share in my running pains and get me through the bad times.

I’m back up. I’m running.

Dear coach, let’s start again. I’m ready.

Running with KK is quite a stressful run. Not only do we not run at the same pace, but I am constantly feeling anxious, which is not how I should feel when I run.

Today I figured out why.

We had set out to run a nice, slow, relaxing Sunday run. KK planned to do 12kms while I settled for the 9km route. As we got to the split where he would run off to do the extended stretch, we stopped to catch our breath and for KK to give me a heads up on the route I was taking as I was not that familiar with it.

He said, “Right, you go up this road and you will encounter two hills. The first one is very steep, then the road dips, then you go up again for the next hill. I’m going straight so that I can get some water at the Caltex garage. I’ll catch up with you. K, go! And remember, two hills. First one up, then a dip, then another hill.” And off he ran.

I must admit… all I heard was hill, then another one. And repeat, one hill, followed by another one. By the time I started to run again, mentally it felt like there was a mountain ahead of me and I dreaded it.

The thing with KK is that as an engineer, it’s all about fact. No beating around the bush. In his mind, he was giving me an exact, detailed description of what lay ahead. He won’t sugar-coat it either. You know exactly what’s ahead of you.

When we did finally meet up again, I told him that perhaps next time he needs to kindly put more emphasis on the down hills ahead and help motivate me more in climbing those hills.

But as I was saying it, I could see the confused look on his face. Nope. He’s an engineer. It’s either black or white and in his mind, it’s the same with running. I guess that’s just how he conquers those up hills too – knowing exactly what’s ahead and planning for it.

I think next time we go for a run, I’m not going to ask what’s ahead. I know he’ll tell me!