Forced to sit this one out

Posted on January 5, 2014 by Bo

New Year’s resolutions look differently when you’ve had the rough December I’ve had…

On the 17^th December, I lay in a hospital bed with a drip in my hand in the Sandton Medical emergency room feeling absolutely miserable. Just a week away from celebrating Christmas, I realised that the last three months have been the worst I have ever felt battling a disease I have tried desperately to hide from majority of those around me. Managing the actual disease has been fine but the extra-intestinal manifestations of Ulcerative Colitis have really taken its toll.

Excruciating arthritis attacks on the joints of my hands and shoulders; painful eye infections due to the arthritis which caused my whole cheek to seize up; a revolting rash (and another late night hospital visit) which turned out to be Urticaria; constant mouth ulcers and now something new… Crippling pain in the right hand side of my abdomen shooting up into my shoulder.

I’ve spent quite a lot of time reflecting on my health during December. Being an utter control freak it’s difficult accepting that there is absolutely nothing I can do to control an auto-immune disease which at the moment seems to be attacking me on all fronts. Ironically, the worst part is that I’ve not been able to run.

I had planned to do so much running while I was on leave during this time, especially training for the Dischem half marathon which would kick-off my 2014 running year. But with the pain and no energy, all I managed was a 5km run at the gym.

My blog has always been focused on my running speed. My slow pace and my insecurities about my running. But sitting on that hospital bed, all I wished for was that I was healthy and able to put on my running shoes and head out for a run. I thought, who the hell cares how slow I run. I don’t even give a damn if those walkers come past me. I just want to be healthy and fit enough to run.

Running means I’m strong. Running means I am healthy. Running means I am able to conquer my fears. Running means I am in control of my body. I’m sure I’ll be fit soon but for now, my New Year’s ~~resolution~~ wish is for a healthy body.

Focusing on the negative. (Expert level)

Posted on August 25, 2013 by Bo

The first kilometer of the running route from my house starts on a ~~very~~ semi-steep uphill. Because of this, I usually use the first kilometer to ‘warm up’ and walk. But my running has been getting stronger and one afternoon, I found myself managing to run the entire kilometer without stopping. I was thrilled! When I reached the top at the swimming school, my heart felt like it would jump out of my chest, more from happiness than exertion. I could not stop smiling. My inner voice was saying, “Well done Bron!” Best . Feeling. Ever!

Two minutes later, another runner caught up to me and we started making conversation. We exchanged pleasant neighborhood chatter and discussed some of our road races. A few minutes had passed and I was enjoying running with her when out of the blue, she said, “Well, nice to have met you. Enjoy the rest of your run, I need to get going and run a little faster. I need to get home before the sun sets.” And off she ran…

That’s when all the negative thoughts flooded my head:

Before the sun sets? What the…? Yes, because I’m so slow, right? No one wants to run with you Bron. No one! You’re too slow!

When she was out of sight, I slowed down (even more) and was still grumbling to myself when I suddenly thought back to how my run had started. I had managed to run up to the swimming school without walking. That was a great moment and it was brilliant! So then how the hell did I manage to allow my run to dip into such a negative mood. Why did it become all about my speed? How did I go so quickly from celebrating reaching a goal to focus on one of my biggest running insecurities?

Lesson learnt: It’s an area I need to work on. Breaking myself down happens so quickly and so easily. It’s destructive. I need to focus on my achievements and stop obsessing on the negative. I’m proud of myself. I ran the first kilometer from home all the way up the hill, to the swimming school, for the first time, without walking. Yeah! That’s what I want to take out of that run. Because that’s what counts!

(Image from Google)

Going into running hibernation

Posted on June 13, 2013 by Bo

The Comrades marathon always signals the “year end” of my running year. As winter arrives and with it, dark evenings and chilly mornings, my running mileage takes a dive as I slow down and find ~~excuses~~ reasons not to run. During this time of year, there are very few races on the race calendar, it’s a ghost town at time trial and you find a couple of brave runners venturing into trail running. (I’m considering that idea myself.)

As I look back and take stock of the races I’ve run in the year under review, I must admit that this year has been one of my favourites. I had minimal injuries compared to last year’s plantar fasciitis pain and even though I entered fewer races than previous years, the ones I did run stand out for me for different reasons.

I started 2013 with the Johnson Crane & Pick ‘n Pay half marathons – two of my favourite 21km races. It was after seeing the smiles of joy on runner’s faces at the finish line of the Johnson Crane that made me ask myself, “Who cares how long it takes me to run 21kms! I want to be as happy as these runners!” It set the tone for the rest of the year.

I absolutely loved the KFC Valentines night race. Loved! This was my very first race I ran years ago, so going back and running it again was just magical! I also returned to conquer the Deloitte half marathon! After coming dead last (I kid you not) in 2009 and vowing never to run it again, I did it!

A race I did expect to come last in (but didn’t) was the Springs Striders 15km race because there were so few runners participating. But it turned out to be so memorable especially running in the mist which was so eerily quiet and beautiful! Running at my pace had its advantages as I missed the Pick ‘n Pay shootout during the RAC 10km race!

But ironically, it wasn’t just these races that stood out for me. I must confess that I enjoyed my running mainly because of the shorter unplanned distances too. Getting home after work and heading out into the hot afternoon, watching the sun setting, chatting to my running partner (@terencetobin) was what made the difference for me.

I didn’t over-analyse every run like I normally do but just enjoyed each run for what it was. Just me. Out on the road. Running.

Getting back into the swing of things

Posted on January 28, 2013 by Bo

In October last year, I made myself a promise that Johnson Crane would be my first half marathon of 2013. I started training in November and kept to a disciplined routine of weekly running, even managing to sneak in a 16km LSD. But it came as a surprise to me when I ran Johnson Crane this past weekend that I struggled so much. Even though the route is quite flat and fast-paced, I did not manage to make 3 hours (story of my life!).

Wait a minute. Why am I so critical of myself. When I sat down and thought about it, I realised that this race is my first 21.1km race since Two Oceans in 2011. That’s almost 2 years since I’ve run that kind of distance. I’ve run a couple of 10km races here and there, but the training and dedication for half marathons was put on hold last year as I rested a foot injury (and a mental block).

It was good to experience a half marathon again: The familiarity of the nerves at the starting line, the crowds, the vibe, the discussions I have in my head as I negotiate each and every one of those 3 hours and the absolute joy of crossing the finish line.

However, it did get me thinking and when I do any running analysis, I like to consult my “Lore of Running” ~~bible~~ handbook. This is what I found: there are 15 training laws listed. The very first law says this:

Law 1: Train Frequently, All Year-Round. If you want to be a good athlete, you must train all the year round, no matter what. What is really required is a little exercise constantly; this will benefit you permanently to a far greater degree than single heavy doses at long intervals.

I needed the break. But running does not come naturally to me and while a 10km race is easy, the 21km races requires me to dig a whole lot deeper, both physically and mentally.

The lesson in it for me is that to be good at something takes practice. Constant practice. Not only with running, but other areas of my life too. I can’t neglect certain aspects of my life and come back expecting everything to be the same as it always was. It’s about frequency, all the time.