Bush getaway to remind me of my youth

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This gallery contains 13 photos.

When we were growing up, we never went to the sea on holiday. For us, family holidays meant my dad’s 4X4 bakkie pulling a Jurgens caravan through the Kruger National Park. On a recent weekend away to Madikwe Game Reserve I was reminded of some … Continue reading

Lessons from 9/11 about married life

11 years ago today, I was four days away from getting married when the world was changed forever by the fateful events of 9/11. It was a Tuesday. I was 26 years old and about to marry the man of my dreams. I had no idea what awaited me. It’s only now, 11 years later, that I look back at that week with fresh eyes.

Perhaps I’m a little older and wiser, but I realise that there are some valuable lessons for my marriage I have learnt from 9/11.

  • Expect the unexpected. Just like those two planes, sometimes, with no warning at all, problems, issues, even events will hit your marriage with all its might and come out of nowhere. It is usually unexpected. You cannot know what and when something will come which will test your marriage. But it happens.
  • Ensure your marriage is strong enough to withstand the hits. If not, one or even both of you will come crashing down.
  • Through the years, there will be pain, hurt, anger and blame. But it’s important to deal with those feelings and move on. Every relationship goes through the dips. Always re-build something new.
  • Prepare relentlessly. It was New York’s mayor at the time, Rudi Giuliani, who said, “when faced with new and stressful situations, prepare relentlessly”. Giuliani adds, “Don’t assume a damn thing.”  Do not slip into a comfort zone but keep on your toes and keep the relationship alive. Be prepared.
  • Change. Adapt. Or die. The world was forced to change after 9/11. I am a very different woman compared to the girl I was when I got married so many years ago. KK has also changed, but we’ve managed to grow together. Anticipate that each other will change. It’s only normal. It’s a good thing, embrace it.

Time has flown. I cannot believe how quickly 11 years has gone by and how much has happened in that time. We built a house, we bought new cars, we changed jobs, we got two dogs, and we travelled to some wonderful destinations.

I even started running!!

But we also lost Pa as well as Marla. I got diagnosed with a disease and we lost quite a few friends along the way. But through the highs and the lows, I’ve walked every step of the way with you KK. I still love you with all my heart.

Happy Anniversary week my babes. X

The day it snowed in Jozi warmed my heart

When you work in a corporate environment, you come to realise that stress, politics and work pressure are part of everyday life. I have found the past few months particularly tough, not only for me, but also for my colleagues.

I have searched for many ways of encouraging them. Out of desperation, I have even proposed a rather cheesy idea to the head honcho of the department, hoping it would bring a spark back to people’s faces. But no luck. When people are down and demotivated, it’s very difficult for them to see anything positive in whatever you do.

But something magical happened today. Something unexpected. It snowed in Jozi.

At first, staff would casually walk up to the windows and look down. But as it became heavier and heavier, excitement grew and more and more people gathered together at the windows. It took one person to say, “Hey! Let’s go outside and play in the snow!” for everyone to grab their jackets and head on out. The excitement and giggling was electric.

What a sight to see hundreds of people from other departments all with the same idea, queuing at the ‘cattle gates’ to get passed security and out of the building.

Once we got out, we laughed and giggled and stood in the snow with massive smiles on our faces. I looked around and saw colleagues having fun. I saw them laughing and hugging and taking photos of each other and acting silly. We were like kids! We didn’t care if it was cold and we didn’t care how wet we were getting. It was awesome. But for the 5 minutes we stood out there, it was as if all the problems disappeared.

I realised that the snow was for me, more than them. You see, although I’ve been part of a project team where the focus is on “people” and changing that cold, hard corporate culture, I have also felt incredibly ‘responsible’ for their happiness in the office. It’s been a bit of a burden on my shoulders and a lot of my stress has been frustration in not seeing a change in culture and a vibe remaining so negative.

But today was different. Today came out of nowhere. The lesson I learnt was that laughter and fun will come at the most unexpected times. But also, that sometimes, I’m not the one that will bring about the change. I just need to be present. But most of all, I need to start laughing too!

My left foot

I’ve recently been part of a team interviewing potential candidates for a position in the department. Scanning through CV’s and watching how different people use different skills to ‘sell’ themselves has been quite interesting to observe.

Some people pride themselves on their qualifications. Others attempt to impress with future plans of obtaining MBAs. But then there are those that have caught my attention just because they are so down to earth and ‘real’ that its easy to see how they have gotten to where they have, simply by having the right attitude.

I know everyone has heard the lessons about having the right attitude. But it’s when I came across some old photographs of my High School netball courts that some valuable lessons were remembered.

I’ll admit that I wasn’t exactly the strongest or best player in the team. I think for the majority of my high school years, I was the reserve for the B-side! But hey, I never gave up. I landed up playing quite a few games and that’s all that mattered.

We once played an away game at another school and I went with as reserve and landed up being asked to play. When we were changing in the locker rooms, I realised that although I had packed in my takkies, I had accidentally packed in two left shoes (yes, I had two pairs of takkies that looked similar).

My heart sank!

There was no going back and I had to play. The only person I told was my best friend and she giggled herself silly throughout the game as I ran around trying not to look like a total spaz with my two left feet. Nobody noticed (or if they did, no one said anything) and we went on to win the match.

In my humble opinion, sometimes the degrees and certificates you have are great. But often, it’s your attitude that determines how you approach life and see the world. It’s your attitude that makes you a winner.